“In each human being there is a meeting with the divine. That intersection is the heart.”
– Coleman Barks
Jen waltzed into my office with a twinkle in her eyes. This was the third time she came to see me within a 12-month period. Right away, I could tell that something was different this time: Jen seemed calmer, surer of herself. Underneath the nervous energy, her excitement was palpable.
Jen barely needed me this time. By session three, she had resigned from a leadership position she worked hard to get, sold her house, and bought a one-way ticket to Ireland. After a year of painstaking discernment and wrestling with fear of all sorts, Jen has finally managed to answer the call of her heart.
Hands down, this is my favorite part of doing this work: to witness the birth of a new life chapter. Not every new life chapter is as dramatic as Jen’s; but almost always, when consciously chosen, a new life chapter brings a burst of energy fueled by a new sense of freedom, excitement, and hope.
My observation of many of my clients’ experiences and that of my own is this: a new life chapter usually begins with the call of one’s heart. Your ability to hear and, eventually answer that call, determines whether you can move into a richer life experience.
Why does the heart call for you?
Much of our lives is consumed by activities aimed at achieving physical and psychological survival, safety, and comfort. Once achieved, our brains are hardwired to maintain the status quo. Your heart, on the contrary, is the place that stores your deepest dreams and desires; it has a much bigger agenda: to guide you to a life you really want, a life of vitality, joy, and peace. To achieve this, it will call you to go beyond your comfort zone.
7 Signs that your heart is calling you
How do you know your heart is calling you? Based on my observations, there are 7 signs that point to the call of the heart. The first four are internal signs and the last three are external signs.
#1. Persistent Feelings and Thoughts
Research has shown that an average person has up to sixty thousand thoughts a day. Many of these thoughts are passing, never to return; some purely functional, disappearing once a certain task is completed. Those thoughts that persist over a long period of time, seemingly against your will, are the ones your heart wants you to pay attention to.
These feelings and thoughts are often like the two sides of the same coin:
On one side, there are feelings of discontent/dissatisfaction: feeling something is missing, aimlessness, or feelings of boredom. The associated thought is: “Is this all there is?”
On the other side, you feel the desire to do, to have, or to be something or someone else. You often find your thoughts drawn to the object of your desire.
#2: Dreams (when you’re asleep)
If you’re someone who is good at pushing away your feelings and thoughts during your waking hours, the heart will often speak to you in your night dreams when your defenses are down. No one can suppress how he/she feels in his/her dreams. Keeping a dream journal and writing down your dreams as soon as you wake up can help you listen to your heart’s messages.
#3: Gentle Whispers
Paradoxically, the heart makes its most powerful call in a “small, still voice”. The more powerful the call, the gentler the voice tends to be. The quality and the tone of that voice is gentle, quiet, and loving, like the whisper of a loved one. It’s never harsh. It never shouts. If you’re calm and relaxed enough, you’ll hear its crystal-clear message.
#4: Massive Resistance
One sure sign that your heart is calling you is the massive resistance you feel towards its message. Most of us rather drown in the familiar security of the status quo than venturing into a future we can’t even imagine. The call of the heart challenges status quo and threatens our sense of safety and security. It can evoke massive fear that includes:
- Fear of the unknown
- Fear of failure
- Fear of disapproval from others
- Fear of letting go (comfort, security, previous held beliefs/values, old identity, etc.)
We humans don’t do well with these fears. We tend to try to avoid them if we can. But resisting the call of the heart out of fear comes with a heavy price: you lose vitality, joy, and peace.
#5: Synchronicity
The heart conspires with the external world to send you the same message repeatedly to get your attention and to reinforce the call you already sense from within.
You experience this as “meaningful coincidences” where two or more signs that occurred randomly confirm your inner knowing. It can be anything: a song you hear on the radio, a movie you happen to watch, words that jump out of the page you’re reading, a conversation with a stranger at the grocery store…anything. It’ll be personally significant to you only. You’ll know it when you encounter it.
Synchronicity is the magic of the heart.
#6: Hitting the Wall/Spinning the Wheels
Most of us are creatures of habits. Coupled with our natural fear of the unknown, our brains push us down the same road over and over despite sensing the call of our hearts to change direction.
What happens when you ignore or resist the call of your heart? Wanting the best for you, the heart often throws more and more obstacles onto the old road you keep heading down to get you to turn around. That’s the reason you may feel like hitting the wall or spinning your wheels with what you’re doing no matter how hard you try. You think it’s you or just bad luck. It may be the case, but it may also be your heart watching out for you and is trying to get you to change direction.
#7: Wake-up Calls
The wake-up call is your heart’s last attempt to get your attention. It’s the last resort when all other options are exhausted. Wake-up calls are painful, sometimes extremely painful. It usually involves losing or being on the verge of losing something or someone dear to you: a loved one, a job, a significant relationship, your health…As painful as it is, wake-up calls usually do the trick. Have you ever heard someone referring to the ordeal he’s been through as the best thing that ever happened to him? He is talking about his wake-up call.
Questions for You
Which of the signs above have you experienced?
What is your heart trying to tell you?
Here is what I’ve observed from working with hundreds of clients and my own life: the heart is very powerful. It usually wins. Ignore its call at your own peril.
Change is inevitable, whether you choose it or it chooses you. If you are ready to embrace change and embark on the journey of transitioning into a brighter future, contact me for a complimentary consultation to find out whether I’d be a good fit to serve you.
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